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Heartbeat

by Jillian Rae

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  • Compact Disc (CD) + Digital Album

    Includes unlimited streaming of Heartbeat via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.
    ships out within 2 days
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      $10 USD or more 

     

  • "Who the fuck is Jillian Rae?" T-Shirt
    T-Shirt/Apparel

    WHO THE FUCK IS JILLIAN RAE?

    An Oxblood Black (a very dark red) t-shirt that reads "Who the fuck is Jillian Rae?" in a college style typography.

    This t-shirt is a Bella + Canvas 3001 4.2 oz. 100% airlume combed and ringspun cotton, side seams, retail fit, shoulder to shoulder taping, unisex sizing, and a tearaway label. (Meaning: it's really soft and cozy.)

    THIS IS A PRE-ORDER T-SHIRT RUN!
    Which means: We will have the orders open for a few days, you will make your order & pay in advance, then the shirts will be printed, and shipped to you as soon as they are made.

    Free US Shipping included with purchase.

    Thank you for your support and ENJOY your new (slighty profane) cozy-af T-shirt!
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1.
Heartbeat 04:19
Ooo I’ve got it bad, I’ve got it so so bad for you. All you have to do is walk into the room. And I can feel my heartbeat. My body feels your eyes with a tingle in my spine. And when you speak my name I feel hypnotized. All because my heartbeat, is running wild. I’d do anything, do anything. To be alone with you. I’d give anything, give anything. To know what you would do. You walk right up to me, look in my eyes what do you see. Do I give it all away or do I keep the mystery. Inside my heart, inside my heartbeat. Please don’t get too close because I don’t know what I’ll do. This pounding in my chest says I’ll do anything for you. I can’t control my heartbeat, when you’re around. Your hand upon my hand. Your fingers running through my hair. Your breath upon my skin. Your lips reveal everything.
2.
I never thought I’d see the day thatI’d watch you walk away I whisper softly to myself. I know that you don’t understand anything that’s in my head. I guess I should have seen it coming. It’s not that simple, to wait around just for everyone else. So many feelings to consider. What happened to us? You know I always thought you’d be the one. The one to... Sweep me off my feet. Tell me that you need me. Tell me I’m the only one. Sweep me off my feet. Tell me that you love me. Tell me that you really know. I guess the time has finally come for us to go our separate ways. Somehow I’m just not that prepared. You know that this is for the best. It’s real not some kind of test. Can’t say I’m not a little scared. It’s not that simple, to say goodbye after all this time. So many words we left unsaid. What happened to us? You know I always thought you’d be the one. The one to...
3.
Somebody 05:27
Run run run away, run as fast as you can. Keep keep keeping up, never was part of the plan. Then you wake up, and things have changed. Then you grow up, hardly recognize your own face. Hide hide hiding out, deep in the back of your heart. Head keeps telling you, telling you it’s gonna be alright. Then you notice, that it’s not. Then you realize, in the end you’re all you’ve got. I was blind back then I couldn’t see. The light inside the darkest part of me. Then somebody came around. Helped me forget myself. Showed me there’s more to life. But then, it turned out, That somebody wasn’t the one. No no noticing, nothing quite feels the same. Try try trying to, trying to figure it out. When your insides, say something’s wrong. But your logic, questions what all the fuss is about. Wake wake waking up, suddenly feels like a dream. Re reality, isn’t as real as ituse to seem
4.
You’re a bright young lady with your head in the stars. With your dark curly hair and your killer smile. Not a worry in the world cause everything’s taken care of. I was a friendly little girl, barely sixteen. In love with a boy wore my heart on my sleeve. Little did I know what you had in store for me. Nothing I do will ever impress you. Nothing I say will make you care. I’ve tried my best, done all I can do. Now I’m thinking that it’s time I lay it to rest. I’m not saying that I’m giving up. I’m just saying that I’ve had enough. One foot in front of the other. I’m moving on. I can never tell by the look in your eye, if you’re pulling Dr. Jekyl or Mr. Hyde. One minute you’re laughing the next you’re pounding fists. I should’ve known this would never last. Should’ve hit the ground running, never look back. But love and my foolish heart could not resist.
5.
Please lose my number. You’ve been calling, I don’t want to talk. Please loose my number. My phone is ringing off the hook. I don’t want you back. Don’t write me letters. A thousand words won’t change anything. Oh don’t write me letters. You can try, nothing’s gonna work. I don’t want you back. I am finished. This conversation’s gone on way too long. Honey I am finished. I’m closing my door for good. I don’t want you back. Why do you keep coming back to me? What’s done is done, you can’t hang around. You broke my heart and played me for a fool, yet you think that all is forgiven. And I’ll take you back with open arms. I don’t think so. (I don’t think so.) I don’t want you back. I don’t want you back.
6.
Chains 04:03
I’m lying here in these chains. You walked away and took the key. How could you leave me behind. Naked, cold, alone and crying. I should not believe a single word that you say. You fill my ear with "honey, dear." You shouldn’t say things you don’t mean. It’s been seven years and I have waited patiently. Now the time has come to move along and take care of me. Never will I love and get no loving in return. Time after time I look away. You do me wrong. I never learn.
7.
This room is so crowded even though I’m alone. My thoughts closing in on me. Then you walk in say, “How has your day been?” With a hug and a kiss on the cheek. It’s funny how something so simple can make or break how you feel. When you’re hanging off the edge of disaster, but only two steps away from ok. So I wanna thank you for hanging around. Even when I hate you, you keep my feet on the ground. And when I push you away, you love me anyway. Good can be great and bad can be awful. No one said love was easy. Smiles and tears, hugs and tantrums. Guess you could say we’ve seen it all. Every time I need you, there you appear by my side. But sometimes solitude is all I need to get by. And when I push you away, you love me anyway.
8.
Last Time 05:33
I woke up this morning, pulled the covers off and I saw the pillow where you should have been. Emptiness was fogging the window in my head. Where did you go and would you come back home? I saw the note you wrote in the hall. Scribbled in pen, in a hurry. What are you running from? It’s only seven a.m. and you’re so far away from here. From me. She says jump, you say how far? Sometimes I wonder who you are. You’re not the same old person you use to be.
9.
Hanging On 02:59
There’s a hole in my heart where my love use to be. You took it all from me and then some. No matter what I do, I can’t stop thinking of you. I didn’t know what I had til I had none. Oooo, I’m in trouble. Oooo, I know you’re gone. But I can’t help the way I feel. My love for you is real. It’s the one thing that keeps me hanging on. Every day is a test. And all the one’s who know me best, understand they need to keep their distance. What I really need is time and I know that I’ll be fine. Patience is torture and a virtue. Oooo, I’m in trouble. Oooo, it’s been so long. Though it feels like you’ve died, I know I’m changing inside. It’s the one thing that keeps me hanging on. The one thing that keeps me hanging on.
10.
Helpless 04:23
There you go again. Keeping me waiting. String me along. Ooo, you drive me crazy. You’re all I ever wanted. So bad I could scream. Cause you’re everything, that you shouldn’t be. Tie me up, hold me down. I’ll try to convince you. But I know I won’t resist you. I’m helpless. See what you do to me. Baby you’re no good for me. You’ve got me eating out of your hand. Against my better judgement. What does it feel so good, to be so bad? This is nothing new for us. It’s the same as it ever was. You’re all I ever wanted. So bad I could scream. Cause you’re everything, that you shouldn’t be.

credits

released December 10, 2013

produced by Matthew DiRose
engineered by Rob Oesterlin
mixed by Jason Orris
mastered by Dave Gardner at Magneto Mastering
recorded at The Terrarium

Jillian Rae vocals. violin.
Eric Martin guitars.
Josie Just wurlitzer. rhodes. piano.
Kevin Rowe bass. backing. vocals.
Mark O'Day drums. tambourine. shaker. chains.

cover art by Mark Rivard
album design by Jane Gardner
photographs by Jane Gardner & Eric Martin

© Jillian Rae 2013
℗ Iron Bull Records 2013
ASCAP All Rights Reserved
unauthorized duplication is a violation of applicable laws

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Jillian Rae Minneapolis, Minnesota

Jillian Rae is a singer, songwriter, violinist, session musician, producer, arranger, & educator. Since her debut album in 2013 (Heartbeat), Rae has released 5 singles, an EP, & a 2nd full length album (I Can’t Be The One You Want Me To Be, 2019). The album’s final track Wayward One was featured in the hit Chinese film The White Storm 2, & has catapulted her into near stardom in China. ... more

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